Thursday, February 03, 2011

Goodbye, My Friend

Another important person in my life has passed. My brother in law(hmm, how do I put this), was finally given the knockout punch early this morning. He starved himself to death as many at that stage are want to do. Damn fucking son of a bitch fucking damn fucking.....cancer. Fuck. Sorry. He was one of the kindest, generous, most decent people I've ever had the chance to know. And, at the age of 56 (shit). Curtis had the driest, most incredible wit I've ever experienced. We developed an early connection in the relationship because we were in love with siblings. We knew what the "Redow production number" meant. The invention of drinking "rockets" on Christmas and then totally forgetting the recipe, no one knows what's in them now, "Queen" Joanie (whom he's with at this time). A man of taste, style and class. A man who, in every picture, is smiling. A trusted friend and mentor to my kids who worshipped the ground he walked on. And always will. A man who will now never grow old and leaves a wonderful person on this Earth alone and devastated. 30 years together and now each one of them are free of the things that wore them down and created a burden on their shoulders. When I first got into the relationship, I knew I was in the big city because it involved gay people in the family. The horrors. Being a kid from the farm, while coming through Kansas City and such, I never formed much of an opinion either way. More curiosity than anything. I can amazingly and honestly say that apparently you CAN'T catch it, because neither one of the kids are gay. That I know of. The joke was always that Curtis and Micheal were together for longer than any of the hetero sexual couples. And it wasn't even close. They didn't "divorce". This was love. From the depths of their souls, truer love has never existed.
So, fare thee well, my friend and colleague. I know you'll set a place for me at the table of the father along with the rest of my family because you were, indeed, my family. Your grace and goodness will be reverberated through the generations of my daughter's children's, children's, children.
You, sir are legend.

"You and I will meet again...When we're least expecting it. One day in some far off place...I will recognize your face...I won't say goodbye my friend...For you and I will meet again"---Tom Petty
Curtis Bright 1955-2011
I will always love you.

Sunday, January 30, 2011

Trying To Loosen My Load, I Got Seven Women On My Mind

Sitting at the two week precipice of 55, there are a few things I've found out. It's hard to do, but you really can't sweat the small stuff and the things you can't control. Certain things never change and the biggest thing that never changes is change.
"Changes changing places, chain yourself to the the ground..." I need to gain control of my body again, just like I did twenty years ago. I will drop twenty pounds in three months not because I want to, but the line has been crossed where I need to.
2011 has started with the most difficult and challenging circumstances I have experienced in a while. I'm halfway through what I need to do...while Sunday morning is one of my favorite times, I'm not sure why Sunday afternoon bothers me so much. I think 4:30-5pm on Sunday night is one of my least favorite time of the week. It may have something to do with separation anxiety when I was a kid or something but I have never ever liked Sunday afternoon. I'm glad it's over.

I don't know half the people on the awards show anymore. Yes, I'm turning 55. My mom once said a number of years ago that "things were happening too fast" she felt out of it and left behind and she didn't know anyone on TV anymore. When I hear that Ringo is 70, it makes me stop and think of days gone by and grab a new perspective on the who, what, when why and how. I know where.

Set and ready to go in Farmington ahead of the storm, huddled in to the room until the storm of the century has passed and hopefully the end of a long long lonely winter.

I love the "mayhem" campaign by Allsate featuring the guy who played on "Oz". It's like the "Real men Of Genius" campaign where I'm waiting to see what the next one will be.

The radio station is still picking up steam. I have taken the songs a new direction, it's much more of a classic rock statio with a large playlist than it was an oldies station. I just took out the bubble gum stuff that didn't fit were I wanted it to go. It's now in it's second year of broadcasting. I also added some cool sound effects from the old Beaker Street radio program that broadcast all over the northern continent, bringing the sounds of "King Crimson", "Yes" ,"Atomic Rooster","Iron Butterfly" and more into unsuspecting kids bedrooms everywhere there was an AM radio. Trying to market by the senses.

Rod Stewart is an artist that sends more conflicting messages to me.I have loved some of the things he's done (I still think that "Stay With Me" is one of THE great rock songs), the entire"Every Picture Tells A Story" is a masterpiece. "Never a Dull Moment" was great and then he sank into the "Atlantic Crossing", "Night on the Town" and the dreadful "Blondes Have More Fun" era which brought us "Do Ya Think I'm Sexy" and the total sell out (until recently) of him to disco. he hasn't been relevant for years. He did redeem himself after the disco crap with an album called "Foot Loose and Fancy Free". His crowning moment of that LP was "I Was Only Joking". I remember playing it at KFMH in Muscatine Iowa and every timed I played it , some one called and asked what album that song was on. As I've lived my life, the words are more poignant than ever...

So, as my old friend Oat Willie once said "Onward thru the Fog..."

Lives must be led, and as family members must find their way to the other side of life, we say good bye to my brother in law Curtis Bright. True love like the kind you and Michael shared will never be found again. 30 years together is a long time. We've had four years more than we thought we would, but the end is not always pretty or decent. You're a better man than that, so I wish you a speedy and painless good night. I know how much we'll miss you. 56 is way too young and much too close for comfort.

As someone somewhere once said, when it rains, it pours and in this season, it pours some more.

But, in contrast we welcome young Miss Savannah Kay Carlson, daughter of my nephew Ryan and his lovely bride Amber, who went to the same high school I did, so she was automatically accepted.

It's the storm of the century, hang on wherever you are. I started writing this at 4:30 on a dreary Sunday afternoon on the second to last day of January 2011, approximately 22 months away from the "sun gods" coming back to earth to save us. Chariots of the Gods?

"Take good care of your brother..."
-Jackson Browne

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