Friday, May 25, 2007

Lint Up My Butt

A couple of news items lately has made me wonder what the hell is going on? No, I'm not talking about the Rosie/Elizabeth bitch slap-off that is going to drive ratings through the roof but these two stories...

A 60 year old woman has given birth to twins. No, granted, she dosen't look 60, but my point is this. My dad was 50 when I was brought into the world and 53 when my sister was. Do you honestly think a 67 year old man can even closely identify with what a 17 is thinking, feeling or can relate in anyway what so ever? When my dad was 17 it was 1924!!!!! Aside from all of that, when these kids graduate from high school, mom will be 78. How fucking selfish can you be? Think about the kids, please. This woman lives in a free society, she can do what she wants, but I think this is pure unadulterated selfishness. Good luck with that, I hope it works.

Josh Hancock's father has filed a wrongful death lawsuit against Mike Shannon's, the tow truck driver AND the person who's car broke down on the highway. How ridiculous this seems to me. I have no idea what it is like to lose a child and I hope and pray to God that I will never know. The sympathy that I had for the family has just evaporated into the wind. First off, you sue these people but NOT the Cardinals? Now, these poor saps will have to spend their life savings hiring attorneys (no one knows how costly that can be on the finanaces any more than I) and spending countless days testifying on their behalf. Josh killed Josh. As I said before, he was drunk, speeding, talking on the cell phone and not paying attention. There were no skidmarks, he didn't even see it coming. I wonder how the family is going to feel when the most intimate details of Josh's life will be paraded non stop on ESPN, the local media and everywhere else. Josh Hancock was a good ol' boy from Mississippi who liked to live life on the edge...and it got him. No one else. In fact, it has been quoted that the people at Shannon's tried to call him a cab, but he refused. This movie will not end well.

The Remember Song

Tom Rush is one of the best songwriters no one has ever heard of. This song sums up exactly how I feel on ah most days. This is very funny and oh, how so true.

Picking On Our Friends In Arkansas

A guy from Arkansas passed away and left his entire estate to his beloved widow, but she can't touch it till she's 14.

How do you know when you're staying in an Arkansas hotel? When you call the front desk and say, "I got a leak in my sink," and the clerk replies, "Go ahead."

How can you tell if an Arkansas redneck is married? There's dried tobacco juice on both sides of his pickup truck.

Did you hear that they have raised the minimum drinking age in Arkansas to 32?
It seems they want to keep alcohol out of the high schools.

What do they call reruns of "Hee Haw" in Arkansas ........ Documentaries.

An Arkansas State trooper pulls over a pickup on I-30 and says to the driver, "Got any I.D.?"and the driver replies " 'Bout wut?"

Did you hear about the $3 million Arkansas State Lottery? (Come on-this is funny!) The winner gets $3.00 a year for a million years.

The governor's mansion in Arkansas burned down! Yep. Pert' near took out the whole trailer park. The library was a total loss too. Both books - poof! up in flames, and he hadn't even finished coloring one of them.

A new law was recently passed in Arkansas . When a couple gets divorced,they are STILL cousins.

A guy walks into a bar in Arkansas and orders a mudslide . Thebartender looks at the man and says, "You ain't from 'round here, are ya? "No," replies the man, "I'm from Pennsylvania " The bartender looks at him and says, "Well, what do ya do in Pennsylvania ?" "I'm a taxidermist," said the man. The bartender, looking very bewildered now, asks, "What in the world is a tax-e-derm-ist?" The man says,"I mount animals." The bartender stands back and hollers to the whole bar..."It's okay boys, he's one of us!"

For The Person Who Has Everything

Brian Auger

Last night at the Finale in Clayton, in front of a crowd of about 70 or so, Brian Auger and his son and daughter (shown here) just kicked ass. His son is an accomplished drummer and his daughter is a great singer. Brian has been in the music business since 1960 or so and most will remember a song of his called "Happiness Is Just Round The Bend" which was played on KSHE a great deal. I think that Harold Melvin and The Blue Notes covered the song in the late 70s as well. Covering everything from Marvin Gaye to Wes Montgomery as well as his own stuff, there are very few people who can play that Hammond B3 like him. I needed that, I needed to hear some excellent live music, if just for a little while. Thanks, Brian. He stuck around after the show to sign autographs and chat. I thanked him for all the great years of tunes he has produced.
The video for "Happiness" is on your upper right third one down. Enjoy!
Here's the Wikipedia entry for Brian.

Thursday, May 24, 2007

Way To Go, Joe

If Penn State football coach Joe Paterno is successful this season, the Nittany Lions will go to a bowl game … and have the cleanest stadium in the country.
Angered by the arrest of six of his players in connection with a fight at an off-campus apartment, Paterno will be disciplining his entire team — for the entire season.
Paterno, speaking at a university alumni function in Valley Forge, Pa., said he is going to require all of his players to perform community service.
Paterno said his players “were going to clean out the stadium every Sunday after every home game.” He also said the Nittany Lions would work with the Special Olympics and build a home in Centre County (Pa.) through Habitat for Humanity.
He added that the players would turn their pay for cleaning up Beaver Stadium over to the university’s club sports, whose participants usually perform the work to raise money for their teams.
“We had kids involved in something that was embarrassing, and I think we ought to prove to people that we’re not a bunch of hoodlums,” Paterno, 80, said.
“Obviously, I’m probably going to have to keep one or two of them out of a game and drop one or two on the depth chart. And then whatever (university officials) think they have to do, they do. I want to do something where the whole team kind of says, ‘Hey, we’re all wrong, let’s go.’ ”
State College police arrested six of Paterno’s players, including defensive backfield starters Anthony Scirrotto and Justin King, on April 27, almost four weeks after a brawl at an off-campus apartment. A judge since has dropped charges against four of the six players, including King, but Scirrotto, an all-Big Ten safety, and defensive tackle Chris Baker will stand trial.
Police said Scirrotto and a woman got into an argument on the street with passers-by who insulted the woman and punched Scirrotto. Scirrotto summoned friends and teammates, who met him at the apartment where they knew the passers-by were, and a brawl ensued.

Wha you say? Discipline? being responsible for your actions? What decade is this? I'm rooting for Joe this season except of course when he plays Iowa or Notre Dame for that matter...

I think God has a sense of humor, don't you?

How to tell if a Catholic is driving too fast... Jewish Olympic Swimmer...

The Gates of Heaven

I used to think about the gates to Heaven was described as Pearly, metal things that were "painted" in a pearl color. I myself have very little liking for pearls or their color, leaving that stuff to the admiration of women. I will never see them like this again. Hopefully you will understand after reading the following quote:

John Phillips wrote:
"See these gates, one each? That's to let the suffering of the Lamb live on. All other precious gems are metals from stone, but the pearl is a gem that is formed within an oyster, the only one that is formed by flesh. The humble oyster receives an irritation or wound, and around the offending article that has penetrated and hurt it the oyster forms a pearl. The pearl is the oysters answer to that which has injured it.
The Glory-land is Gods' answer to Christ to wicked men and women who crucified and mocked Heavens beloved and put him to open shame. How like God to make the gates of the New Jerusalem of pearl. The saints will forever be reminded as they come through the gates of Glory to access Gods' home, that is only possible through Calvary."

thanx KK

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Backstage Pass Number Six

From the time I heard "The Necromancer" on KSHE late one night in 1975, these guys were in my spotlight. I realized many years after the fact that I saw this trio in 1974 opening up for Rare Earth at the Palmer College of Chiropractic auditorium in Davenport Iowa. I didn't remember much (I was there to see Rare Earth) but I do remember them having three guys and being REALLY LOUD!! How many times did I play "Spirit of Radio" or "Tom Sawyer" or "Limelight" on the radio? Thousands, literally. I thought they hit their peak with the release of "Grace Under Pressure" and "Power Windows" in the eighties. I haven't followed them much since 1990 or so, but they are still together and Neil Peart still kicks everyone's ass.

Monday, May 21, 2007

Pick Up Basketball Players From Hell

I have been on the court with everyone of these guys and may in fact be a couple. Very funny.


A post on my blog has stirred some friends of mine to write me. I will share these emails with the names changed to protect the innocent. I opened me email on Saturday here in South bend and I got this....

Hey Randy,

Having spent most of the previous three weeks in St. Louis, it is painfully obvious that the Cards are not a very good team. Josh or no Josh. Ugh.

It crossed my mind to call you several times over that period, but I could not pull myself away from my sister's Fenton home except to sleep at my brother's house in Bevo.

Participating in the inevitable death-watch of a terminal sibling is excruciating, but I am deeply thankful to have had the notice so I could sit and talk with her, then talk to her, then just sit and stare at her breathing and then stare at her no longer breathing. Excruciating, yet lucky to have had those moments.

I do not share with you the shortened play-by-play of my most recent stay in St. Louis for any reason except that I recall you having a brother that died prematurely. A small fraternity, perhaps, but still a certain camraderie.

The funeral was Wednesday and I am trying to get back to a routine.

Part of that routine is hitting your blog. I am starting to feel like a freaky stalker that should have a tin-foil hat and call the request line every night to dedicate obscure album cuts. I swear I am not that peson, but it still seems as if "you're talking to me" the way your life seems to have certain intersections with my memory. Then, there is KFMH/Muscatine. While you were working in that two-story gray house buried in the trees off Mulberry Street, I was sitting under the tower out back in the high school. One of my friend's dad was a sales manager there, John Schwandke. He took me to my first concert: Head East & special guest Pat Travers at the RKO Orpheum Theatre in Davenport. Nov 21 1978. A lime-green ticket. Cost $6.50 in advance (although he got them at the radio station) and the whole place was general admission. Ticket #02465. (I am obviously looking at the ticket I retrieved from my collection.)

By August my friend, Warrren Schwandke, was driving and the two of us went back to the Orpheum. This time to see Rush. Tickets for that night were $7.50. Ah, the intimate theater for a big-time rock act. I loved that. How about those ticket prices?! I think soon after that I started buying tickets at some waterbed store in downtown Muscatine that had a head-shop upstairs. It smelled like incense and had a glass case full of pipes. Stone, metal and glass. Bongs and papers. Wow, what a time.

I remember staying up "really late" one night years before because Steve Bridges was on "Tomorrow with Tom Snyder." The segment was not memorable, although I do remember thinking it was a bit embarrassing, but staying up past my bedtime and the anticipation that a local radio goof from Muscatine was going to be on national t.v. was. Why would I remember Steve Bridegs' name? I never worked there. I never applied there. I knew that Tim Lissy worked there and he was only a year older than me. I did make a cassette of a phony radio show in my room many times. Played a collection of album cuts (Supertramp, Head East and such) with me being terribly witty between songs. I wish I still had one of those. I bet it was the worst kind of embarrassing hilarity.

I remember each Sunday night at midnight KFMH would broadcast calibration tones so you could calibrate your quadriphonic tuner/recorder. I did not know anyone had one, but I still thought it was dangged cool to listen to those once in a while. What a geek!
That frequency is now a Cumulus property. It plays white-bread CHR, kinda like one of my former stations in Columbus, WNCI.

Oh, well. I will return to St. Louis under more pleasant circumstances over the summer. I know we will be visiting my now-motherless neice and nephew and their awesome dad. I told Jay Philpot we would get together then, too. I was humbled to hear you two guys had mentioned me at a Cards game. Ironic timing of that... while you two at the Cards game that specific night when my name came up, I was flying to STL on one hour's notice to see my little sister in Barnes-Jewish Siteman Cancer Center. My mom called sobbing uncontrollably that my sister was dying that night, so I dropped everything to get there. It turned out she made it three more weeks and I could not have been more appreciative of the time with her.

My sister kept telling all her visitiors over her final couple weeks to not be sad. She did not want anyone to feel sad. "Happy thoughts," she would encourage everyone with the every-present twinkle in her optimistic eyes. Happy thoughts.

Are you coming up to Conclave? Jay invited me to some dinner he has with abunch of old radio dudes. Sounds like fun. I am looking forward to the evening.

Happy thoughts,

I owe my friend an email and I will write tonight when I get home, as soon as I can compose something that can even closely express what I feel.

Email two....

Hey Randy,

I was going to respond directly to your blog on this subject, but I'll leave it up to you whether you want to publish my remarks for the masses here or not. Please bear in mind that I submit them in the most sincere of regards:

Wow, man, although I can’t relate to what you’re currently going through as a parent--being as I've had no desire to be one myself, and that I’m 9-10 years younger than you--I still have to say that you have led an extraordinarily interesting life compared with mine! You‘ve met more famous people than I have, and have been far more influential to others than I ever hope to be, yet you’ve stuck to your principles all the while--ain‘t nothing wrong with that, dude! My life is pretty bloody boring compared with yours, YET I still drag my sorry ass out of bed every day and play the game, and so should you!

Remember that episode of “All In The Family” where Edith had her crisis of faith which provoked Meathead to ask her, “Did you ever have a subject in school that you didn’t understand?” “Yeah, Algebra--I HATED Algebra!” Edith replied. “But, you didn’t drop out of school, did you?” Mike said. That’s my outlook on things, in a nutshell. There’s a whole shitload of stuff I really don’t get in life, but I keep hanging around anyway, for whatever reason...

Hell, Randy, you’ve got a lot going for you--unlike me, you’re close to your own family and you have a great career going (in spite of that “Sleazy slug“ crap that you call it!). As for me, I’m 60+ pounds overweight, I’m in debt up to my eyeballs with credit cards, I drink a little too much for my own good and I’m bored out of my mind with my job. My social life totally sucks and I’m not very close with my immediate family at all. I haven’t even heard a fucking word from my own best friend in the world since Christmas Eve, and the rest of my friends are all married and/or too busy with their own families to even reply to my e-mails. Jeez, I haven’t had sex in damn near eight years, so forgive me if I feel like I’ve been pretty much kicked the curb by life. Even so, I STILL get up every day and play this daily game anyway, and I stick to my principles, just as you have. Hell, you have more faith than I do--I’m not even religious in the slightest bit--yet I’d like to think there’s some light at the end of this tunnel, all the same…

I’m still standing, and I still seek out those little victories in life every day, just as you do (those pleasant Sunday mornings, the odd Dave Edmunds/Rockpile video, a Royals victory--whatever it may be)--celebrate that fact, if nothing else, my friend! We’re still rockin’, and there ain’t nothing wrong with that…

Yours truly,

Tough love is sometimes the best. I have never met this man, but I hope to someday soon.

Email three:


On your blog, you wrote:

...I understand why my mother drank. It's hard letting go of your kids and getting older. As I am in South Bend, I am so proud of my son for his accomplishments, but then again I am sad for the fact that while I was stumbling through life, the torch has been passed to the next generation. While I wasn't looking, the boy has become a man. Sitting through the public commission ceremony today, it became clear to me why my mom lost her will to live. What is left after the kids leave? What role do we take and how long do we have left? It is truly amazing that parents have dealt with this since the beginning of time. Mixed emotions, I have a ton. So proud, so happy, so sad. My mother drank herself to death. I know I won't go that way but it makes you wonder what purpose does my life have now? I hope to find it.

Wow. You and I have at least our genetics in common. My Mom's side of the family all lacked that "off switch" that allows you to say no. I inherited it and so did my younger sister. I don't talk to her at all, so I have no idea how she's handled it into maturity but I know from personal experience it's a tough demon.

Congrats and best wishes to your son on his graduation and commission in the USAF. I know that you have seriously mixed emotions about relatives in the Armed Forces, but I'm willing to bet he'll make you more proud of him than you can ever believe. I'm going to be at a private dinner with Duncan McNabb, the Commanding General of the Air Mobility Command at Scott, in a few weeks and, if you want, I'll pass along your son's name to him. It never hurts to have a "friend at court" and this is one of the few times I can provide that. I have no idea if he'll be able (or willing) to do anything but you never know. Dunc is a decent guy, and the chances are good he'll wind up on the Joint Chiefs before he cashes out.

But the "empty nest" thing is what I wanted to mention.

Carroll and I have four kids between us, three girls and a boy. Or, more appropriately, three women/mothers and a man (at 32, Jason is the youngest, still single, but we're hoping...). One by one, they moved on with their lives and all have made us proud. They're all professionals in their various fields of endeavor. Sometimes they call us with problems and we help as we can. Most of the time they call just to say hi and tell us they love us.

Watching the nest empty can be terrifying, I know. But what is left after the kids the rest of your life! You spend the years before kids playing and developing a career. Then the kids come and eventually you realize that you have a responsibility to them and tailor your lifestyle to that effort. Then the rascals leave. Damn their eyes!

It's your turn, Randy!

Both of us have been treated shabbily by an industry to which we gave our hearts and souls for a long, long part of our lives. But now we've gone on another track and, with the kids on their own (you always keep the third eye watching them carefully, of course) you have a chance to do some of the things you always wanted.

Don't miss that opportunity. Don't forget the kids, but don't miss the opportunity!

Be well. Now go ye and sell radio time.

I admire this guy more than anyone will know....

Oh yeah, I got one more...

Sorry to hear about Nashville and your on-air radio career coming to an end. You must have many great memories I would think. I know you were celebrity status in SL and KC for a long time…most of us never get to that level in our career. Chin up…you had a good run! Many years ago (before I knew your radio name) I was talking to a guy from SL or KC in a bar in Fairfield, CA. and mentioned that I had a good friend on the radio in SL but I didn’t know his radio name, but I knew him as Randy Raley when we were growing up. He exclaimed…Randy Raley is on the air in SL or KC (I can’t remember)! He said you were an icon at that time. You have a name and a legacy – that’s great! Ten years, or two years, or one year after I build a house or complete a project, nobody even remembers who did it (unless something goes wrong)…I’m dust in the wind (like the song). At least we escaped “the island”, eh?

You’ve done a great job with your kids. I may call for your advice from time to time. I hope I can do as great a job with Max as you’ve done with your kids. He’ll be in 2nd grade in the fall. His last day of first grade is 5/31 – he turns 7 in July. Time is flying by so f**k**g fast – I’m trying to savor all of my time with Max.

I gotta run…Maxster is summoning me now!

Take care ol’ friend,


To all of my friends, emails are coming. Thank you for contributing positively to this very confusing time...I love you all

Sunday, May 20, 2007

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